Reviewed by: mrblue
I've been waiting for a really good Category III film for a long time -- hell, even the "remake" of Naked Killer called Naked Weapon was Cat IIB -- but, unfortunately, Torturous Adventure 2003 isn't it. Despite the title and titillating cover art, it's actually a bit of a boring movie. Sure, it offers up some bare boobs and blood, but not nearly enough of each, at least for this (admittedly jaded) reviewer.
So what's the movie about? Well, the slim plot has a group going to a remote island for a fashion shoot, where they run afoul of the local inbreds, who set out to kill everyone. Even though this is nothing Shakespearean, it might have made for a good slasher/gore film if it didn't take forever to get going.
The first half of the movie deals with one of the guys (all of the actors involved here are pretty low on the HK film food chain, so I'm not really familiar with them at all) banging the model for the shoot, which is shown in pretty graphic detail. Now, all you hairy-palmers out there might be getting excited -- but let me assure you, the nookie scenes are nothing great, because the girl has a total horseface. Seriously, she looks like the wrestler Chyna on a bad day.
And once the blood-letting starts, things don't really improve. The kills are pretty boring -- a guy gets stabbed with bamboo, another gets shot by a crossbow, and so on. There's little of the chutzpah and outrageousness which characterizes the best movies of this genre. Worse yet, there's almost no blood. I mean, come on, it's a Cat III movie -- I would rather see buckets of guts rather than a small glimpse of some ugly actress' nether regions.
Still, for some reason, I still had a fairly decent time with Torturous Adventure 2003. Maybe it was because Hong Kong cinema has been so dull lately, or maybe I'm just hard up for something better to do, but overall (despite this being yet another shot-on-video straight-to-rental "masterpiece") this isn't too bad of a movie, and most horror/exploitation fans will find Torturous Adventure 2003 at least worth a viewing.
[review from www.hkfilm.net]